It is still buzzing in my head how much it bothers me that people don't say, omg you've lost so much weight since i've seen you last. I did come up with another possibility, one I really don't like, but it very likely.
People don't notice I am thinner because I am still overweight. Fat is fat. If you are overweight it doesn't matter if it's 10 pounds or 100 pounds. And that makes me sad. Either your fit or your fat. No in between.
Have we as a society become that messed up in the head that body dysmorphic disorder just runs rampant? I don't pretend to be innocent of it either, what I see in the mirror is about 100 pounds heavier than what I really am. And I see people all the time give me such a wide berth when they pass me it's like I am 6 feet wide. I'd say it's all in my head, and I am being paranoid, but I know I'm not.
I'd get on a soap box and say blame tv! Blame the advertisement companies! Blame society! But it doesn't matter who's to blame. It you and me who's gotta fix it. I am not saying put more people on tv that are fat, and I am not saying everyone get thin, and I am not saying love who you are. Altho, some of those things should be done. But maybe we should voice out when we see these things happening, nip it in the bud early on... or teach what BDD is in school, bring a little awareness out in the world.
I dunno, I will just say I am frustrated.
Going to the gym today, I feel like hell, but I am going just the same. Maybe it'll be a good pick me up.
You know what's weird? I have reverse BDD. I look in the mirror and think, "I look pretty darned good!" Not too bad, there! Then I see a photo of myself, and I think, "OMG! Is that me? I'm a hippo!!!" Weird, huh? Guess I need pictures of me everywhere for inspiration to get with it. =(
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